I am getting closer to 50...

So another year has come for me to try and remember how old I am. I thought I would never get to that place where I would have to ask my kids and husband how old I am going to be. I realize I am getting closer to 50. I sometimes used to think that was a bad thing, aches and pains, wrinkles and gray hair. But I am learning its not such a bad thing. Do I enjoy my arthritis in my ankles or shoulders, the gray hair I am getting more of or the weight I am struggling to lose, of course I could do without those things. What I am enjoying of getting older is I have my husband who is my best friend to grow old with, my one daughter is married and someday grand kids will come and getting closer to see God.
As I have gotten older some of my personal relationships have changed but I think its really for the better. I might be getting a letter, not an ordinary letter but a letter to tell me what a disappointment I am, how I should be ashamed of my self for being strong, for being different, for being that black sheep, for being God's child and realizing I live for different, I live for my Jesus who wants me to be nice not judgmental, to loves others as I want to be loved, to be giving always and not wanting to receive. So I decided if I get this letter I will not read it, I know from experience it will be like many others I have received. I will throw it away and know I am good, I am my Saviors child, I am forgiven, I am loved and no one really knows me like God does. He's my true father and when I see him I know I probably will ask what could I have done better in my relationships? I am not sure what he would say.
So this birthday Aaron says what do I want to do for my birthday. I said I want to listen to my music on spotify and have some worship time with God listening to songs like, You make beautiful things out of dust by Gungor. I want to just appreciate the day, appreciate God for making me, for using me for the good and the bad stuff in my life. Then off to dinner with my best friend and enjoy quiet time with him. That is a good birthday to me.
Then I will continue to leave a legacy for my kids and grand kids, to show them what it is to be loved by God and to serve him continuously through your life does pay off. I am strong and confident that I have lived a good life so far and have learned so much from my journeys that God has me on. I look forward to continue to draw closer to my Father!
Happy 43rd birthday to me!